7.30.2010

Woah o_O

So this was my night, Enjoy.


AGHHHHHHHHHRGGG! MEh HeeeD Is floating awaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyrrrrrrrr

My head has no heliummme to float to the floor

But my hurrrdd has enough to floattttttt

I'mmmmm Leave on a hoooot air HEAD

Float away Float away To the land of The NBA

Float back Float back To the land of Ideels-i-lac

BUT YEAH! I seen a fucking UFO last night man. Actually The Night of July 30th 2010, so Tonight to me, but to everyone else yesterday, OK! So me and Cameron were sitting on the streeeet , while we watched cars go backwords and turn around. We got up and walked over to the mail box and obseerived the street art. Interesting I thought to myself, as we continued to talk about stuff. Sunddelly over the horrizion a beam of light starting in the middle and ending on the left. It was a ufo! I fucking see a UFO! I'm like laughing and can't get the thought out of my head. It was to bright to be a comet or something oor a plane IT was pretty much a ufo.

Man I'm sounding dumb.

I just mean it was fucking crazy that I saw a UFO. But for a min there, me and Cam were like FUCK I DONT WANT TO MEET ALIENS NOW! But they never came. I want to draw the UFO. So I willl. buttt

I need to flaott up man kno my nhands are filled with hylimumme its hard to type case they keep floating away! LMAO

Drive and Change mean the most!
FUCK!
FUCK FUCK FUCK!


Hearth
Arrives with us
Brings truth to
and Forrr
Door closes on
Son is comming up from
Goat tracks mix with Boat tracks and everyone sings happily
Bombs and sticks jump for trix brack your ankles and bleed and DIE
Owls watch we want them to stop, soon we'll all be cooked in a pie

]WOOOOW{

Yo I'm Hungry
You look fungly
Now I'm stumbling
On to Vidya games.....
I'm going to get food. GOOD NIGHT CANADA!
Paccczzeeey

7.28.2010

A Collaborative Non-Fiction Tale: Camille AND Sean

I've been sitting naked in my room for the past ten minutes. Well not completely naked, I'm wearing a shirt, but still, I'm entirely pant-less. Underwear-less in fact. Is that unusual? Do others do that too? I dunno... but damn this heat wave has been hell! I really don't care what everyone thinks.

I'm actually here because of what happened to me today, it was quite an adventure and I've decided to share it with all of you, it all started when my iPod died like 5 minutes into a solid hour walk I was on. I was like "da fuck iPod, why you frontin'?" but of course it didn't answer because it's not real.

Anywho, I really needed to get on with the walk but how could I? My Disturbia by Rihanna wasn't playing anymore, so I sat there on the curb confused, sorta like a lost puppy waiting for his owner to come save him.

A huge shadow came up and I thought there was a storm coming but then I looked up and it was just a really fat dude. I felt kind of uneasy with this huge fuckin' dude draping over me, so I decided to make average small talk. "I admire your braided beard!" I said to him, but he didn't seem very amused. In fact, he didn't even seem alive. So I told him about how my iPod died and that made him grin which resulted in me being even more uneasy so I stood up and randomly got all defensive and was like, "DID YOU KILL MY FUCKING IPOD!?"... I realize now that that was a mistake. Trust me folks, if a huge dude is eerily standing behind you, don't scream at him because things will just turn out awful.

He then began to open his mouth very wide and started to inhale very hard and everything in the vicinity started to get sucked into his mouth. Everything including me! This dude was totally the spawn of Kirby and I was trapped inside his stomach! He then laughed... or farted... it was hard to tell but all I know is that I was floating in his stomach on what I think was a whole slice of un-chewed pepperoni and anchovy pizza.

So I sat there for a while... like... maybe 30 seconds but it seemed like an hour, and then I started to feel mad hungry! And I still wanted to listen to music AND I still had my destination to reach.

Hunger was the first thing, so I just closed my eyes and plugged my nose and bit into the pizza. After I had a couple bites I then realized that his piece of pizza was about 10 feet tall, so either I was shrunk really small or something fucking weird was going on. I decided on the latter when I noticed there were little pink butterflies with bloody fangs flying around. Yes. In this dude's motherfucking stomach. It occurred to me that, despite how enticing the 10 foot tall slice of pizza was, I had to get the fuck into his intestines and follow it down into his colon so I could inspect some more. I was sure that down there I would find the true meaning of what was going on.

So I held my breath and jumped into the pool of acid (my skin is [mostly] resistant to it... whatuuup) and swam down to the entrance of the intestines and squished through. I came out and was kinda burnt; I looked down and noticed my clothes were burnt away too.

Suddenly I realized that I was sliding, internally, down the shaft of buddy's penis. It was kinda like reverse sex because I was pant-less of course and there was some touching... err... never mind.

To continue, once I got to the tip of the penis I sat down confused at how his stomach led me to his dick. But then I felt some shaking and knew something was up. I heard the slight moans of a black lady and knew this wasn't going to be pretty. It was almost if an earthquake was happening and a huge rush of what looked like a cream cheese Tsunami came shooting up behind me and I was shoved into Aunt Jemimah's pooter. This is what it's like to be a sperm! I'm reliving my existence! ...is what I happily thought until I realized I just got shot out of a bearded Kirby's dick and now I'm stuck inside a uterus!

I was puking profusely all over the place; it never occurred to me the infections I could be giving this woman's vagina. I decided that I needed to get the FUCK outta here and figure out why I'm so suddenly small.

I saw light and decided to jump for it so I said to myself "1...2...3, not only you and me, got 180 degrees, and I'm caught in between.." Wait. That's Britney Spears! I hear it... my iPod? Could it be? It's not with me I think it fell out in this vagina. So before I jumped out I knew that I needed to retrieve it! I don't want to lose it like Sean did in a tragic heroin/garbage man accident. I put on my flashlight helmet and began to walk deeper into the cave of the
All-Knowing Vagina to find my Pod!

As I was ascending the uterus to make my way to the fallopian tubes, I heard Britney's voice again. Soothing, delectable, multi-talented Britney Spears was singing to me! I then saw a bald head which I initially presumed to be her. "Britney!?, da fuck a you doing here?!" I yelled out, but heard no response. As I got closer I figured it out, Britney it was not, it was a penis, but not attached to a human body...wait it wasn't a penis it was a fetus what the fuck am I saying? Sorry they kinda rhyme and this day really wore me out. So yes, this FETUS (not penis) who looked exactly like Britney Spears was full speed ahead of me trying to get my iPod before me... now it was a race-battle to the death!

I then jumped on my floating skateboard and grabbed my double sided Spear of Agony and raced on towards the sound of Britney, while defending myself against this monstrously-possessed fetus. The fetus had these gargantuan fangs that lashed at me! WHAT KIND OF SHE-DEVIL WAS I INSIDE?! (and trust me, that's not the first time I've said that... am I right fellas!?)

I raced up to the floating purple egg, it was all glowy as if like a rave was going on inside. The music got louder and turned to some crazy trance-techno. My iPod is throwing a rave in this lady's egg, I thought! So I kicked the fetus in the eye and stepped on the gas. I began to think that maybe I wanted to join this dance party too, considering I had been without my iPod all day y'know. I took my Spear of Agony and sliced the ovum open only to find my iPod chillin' there, weeping. SINCE WHEN CAN IPODS CRY!? I swear this thing is alive! The fetus was right behind me and with one fell swoop he knocked me off my feet and kicked me in my head and all went black.

A sketch of my poor iPod, all alone in the womb.

When I woke up I was tied up with what I think was an umbilical cord; it was around around my wrists and ankles and a tight one around my neck. "Fuck my life," I thought, "I need to get out before this mutant eats me!" The issue here was that I could not access my Spear of Agony due to the fact I was restrained by umbilical cord... my only hope for escape was to break through with my teeth!

I then closed my eyes and bit down hard on the cord, splitting it in two causing blood to spray out everywhere. I got some in my eye and I had to take a breather, it stung like a bitch. I then repeated the step for my right arm and used that to free the rest of my body. I was out and ready for war: "bring it on mother FUCKER!" I said as I burst out of that umbilical cord all badass-like. My muscles were pulsing like I had just been given some fuckin' steroids and was turning into Superman or some shit. Scratch that, Batman. Batman is way groovy-er. Anywho, I was ready to kick some ass so I ran to my spear and picked it up and with one giant throw I nailed the fetus in the right eye. He yelled out in pain and it echoed all the way to the end of this woman's vagina - a sound that will be stuck with me for the rest of my life - it was almost as if the sound of a cat-fight at night was mixed with the sound of a dying giraffe and then again mixed with an omelette frying in a pan smothered in cheese. Yeah. Crazy shit.

So now Mr. Devil's Resurrection AKA Fetus von Evilus was dead and all I had to do was squeeze through this tight hole to get to my iPod. I finally reached the egg and grabbed it, there was a sign there that said Exit so I followed it.

I dropped down a hole and landed in what seemed like a really shitastic sewer. Then from out of no where a huge rumbling started and I began swirling clockwise (or maybe it was counter-clockwise it was difficult to tell in the chaos) and I was forcefully shoved through a little tube tighter than this bitch's vagina. It felt like one big water slide as I was shot out of this cave into what looks like a children's playground.

I stood up and was covered in shit water and saw this fat bitch squatting so I took my Dagger of Truth (Note: Always carry an assortment of weapons with you) and slit this bitch's throat and got the fuck outta there.

"Where in the fuck did you go?" You might be thinking. Well, this little lad just happened to ride past me on a tandem bicycle, all alone. So I said to the lad, "GIVE ME YOUR FUCKING BIKE!" while shaking my dagger at him and he willingly stopped. He insisted, "why would I give it to you when we can ride together?!" So I jumped on and we rode along singing 'You are my sunshine, my only sunshine!"

Next thing I knew I was wearing pants and was magically home. I didn't even tell this dude where I lived which was kinda fucked up. So I waved him goodbye and he flew off into the clouds like a mystical unicorn.

Then I took my pants off and ripped off my undies (as I do every day when I get home), opened my front door, walked up the stairs and saw my brother (oddly enough he was turned off from my naked lower half and slammed his door). I walked into my room, plunked my booty on the bed and wrote this damn story. Very very factual. And yes, I am still presently pant-less.
Yes this sign is on my door. BEWARE!


-------------------------
Yes, this happened to both of us. When one twin feels it, so does the other. I understand this may upset some people due to the fucked-up nature of our circumstances, but that's just a day in the life of Xesetarip and Izanrelur! We randomly wrote this giving each other 60 seconds to add to the story. You'll never know who is who! Muah ha ha!!

7.27.2010

I Really Wish I Could Explain...

Push for Kush

Stare at the clouds and read words
The sensation of flip-flops
Pet your dog
Find the shadowed man who lives in your basement
Get tied to your chair
Put your brain back in
Charades
Love,
and the barrier of a century.



I don't know what the fuck I write but I know I anticipate reading it the next day because it is always saved somewhere convenient so I can look at it. This I found on my Blackberry. Not sure where the words come from but it's a beauty. I could totally look into it metaphorically or whatever but I don't want to jeopardize whatever the fuck I was actually thinking when I wrote this. That's why I hate dissecting narratives (despite being forced at gunpoint to) because you can never truly know the author's intentions. In this case, even I don't know.


X E S E T A R I P

7.19.2010

Scary Internal Thoughts

Here is a Monday Poem. On a Tuesday. But I wrote it on Monday (or somewhere between Sunday and Monday)!!! I just forgot to post it. I was really fucked up when I wrote this. Like, I haven't been that fucked in a long time. You've seen my other writing... I can type coherently, etc. When I read this in the morning (or, afternoon haha) I kinda got freaked out that I had written this. Moral of the story: Don't do [too many] drugs. The title is what I had found it saved as on my computer desktop. Also, I'm not correcting spelling/grammar. Raw material right hurr.

youd want to read this

i can feel the blood

zap zap zap is all i can feel and

running through me

how did i stand up!

mind is discovvected did i spell thstright

here not here typo typing

where did i pressn enter

i want anoother cookie

my hamdsss

this is sweet

is that oil

too much want more yes

haha yes

one more

one won now

had to go back

stiff

more falls

moooooooooore

will this sound like a metaphor

distracted

back

ooh orange

shakes shaeks shakes its real now

niw it makes sense

bqck]]

back i mean back

NO it will sound sifferent

you have to knmow what im saying!

hard

back

i shouldnt do ths

maybe i should write normal

it feels normal

i know you will see it differently

music

NEED MUSIC

thats much better

pictures

bye



WHAT THE FUCK RIGHT?! Anywho, enough of that bologna. Discussion of Despicable Me coming soon! In the meantime, go see it! It was awesome!


Peace

-Xesetarip

7.13.2010

Last name ever, first name greatest.

So I'm kinda drunk and I'm just going to fucking speak whats on my mind and I don't care you know. It's just going to be little tid bits here and there cause I'm playing a video game, so when I die I write. So I just died...sad...or is that a good thing? I don't know.

OK...WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH PEOPLE WHO TYPE LIKE THEY'RE ARE FUCKING RETARDED. Like when they type shit wrong on purpose cause they think they're gangster or some fucking cool hip kid when really they're just a unintellectual lazy piece of shit. My buddy was telling me how some girl on his Facebook always spells the word 'tired' 'tierd' LIKE WHAT THE FUCK MAN! GROW SOME BALLS AND LEARN TO TYPE FUCK OFF AND GET A JOB! IT just pisses me off. This was maybe cool when I was 12, everyone would use the short cuts and after time I just grew out of it. Punctuation started and spelling fixed it self, but I guess somewhere down the line this didn't to happen certain kids. I have this quote from someone's Formspring,

"Why don't you spell words right?
Cause I don't leik to spell shit right.. it doesn't hurt anyone.."

This is where they're are wrong. It does hurt people, it hurts the person writing cause it just makes them look like a stupid dumb ass retard cocking licking piece of shitty fag. I want to focus on her main answer 'Cause I dont leik to spell shit right' I mean this is probably the dumbest shit I've ever read. Why would someone want to make them look like they dropped outta school in grade nine, are living on the streets and sucking dick for some crack? Beats the fucking hell outta me man. I have a response to this Q'n'A.

"i lik the way u typez same as me baha who needz to spell proprly
Haha thats what I'm sayinnnn! I spell tons ov stuff different.. for instance.. ov instead ov "OF" and .. I deno instead ov I don't know :3"

Not only does someone reading the site respond with basically 'Hey I'm a fucking stupid retard too' but the person running the Formspring decided to give us a little lesson on how to be a 'I dropped outta school when I was in grade 9 and now live on the streets and suck for crack. Don't get me wrong though, I'm not saying the person IS this, they could be a very smart person but the from the way they type they just downgrade them selves and make them look kinda stupid. I just mind fucks me why people would want to do this... maybe they get off on it? type with one hand and jack off with the other well the person they're talking to are all 'What the fuck are you talking about? I don't understand you' while they read this they just go nuts, I don't know...or in their case 'I deno'

So I guess that's my rant for today.

-Izanrelur....take it easy everybody.


7.10.2010

Cause of death: Eggs, after a bad day.

I experienced my first "getting egged" last evening (Ps. if you're reading this and you're one of the fuckers who egged me: you're dumb. But... you gave me something to write about so... thanks?). Anywho, I was with my sister... and I really think we didn't give the eggers (?) the reaction they were looking for. Here's the thing...

-First of all, when you egg someone, what is the joy? My sister and I were discussing how an egger's only purpose is to make someone have a slightly more awful day than they were already having; it doesn't really serve another purpose. "Oooh let's wreck their clothes!" Fair enough.
-The other thing I could see the potential joy in is the persons' reactions. But if you're scootin' along in a car (particularly going 70kph+) it doesn't give you much time to savour.
-So this is why we were kind of bummers for targets:

Since we were relatively, extremely high, we reacted so slow to being egged. The scenario, for me went like this: we were walking, I heard a noise, some yelling, a van drive by and then something cold on my leg (which I thought was water thrown). Then my sister yelled and I asked her why and she said we had been egged. I didn't believe her either, I was like "nah it's water." And then I kinda turned around to inspect the scene of the crime. So the van was long gone before I even realized what happened. And it took a solid 3 seconds for me to react to being hit initially (therefore the van was too far to see the reaction). So yeah, they just hit us and saw us continue walking along... which I imagine would be quite lame, and a waste of delicious, delicious eggs. But wouldn't it have been dramatic if we whipped out a gun and BANG.

So we continued walking, and out of the dark this man came and lit up a cigarette... and we were quite a distance from him but he saw us turn around and look at him. He then yelled "HEY HEY! Come here!" and we got scared and kept walking. But later I thought... what if he just wanted the eggs all over our clothes to cook as a nice midnight snack to accompany his cigarette? We were so rude!

This is where we began to discuss the purpose of egging, which, as I stated in paragraph 2, line 2 is, "to make someone have a slightly more awful day than they were already having." We came up with a scenario: What if this person's dog died and then their mom died and thus their dad killed himself and they returned home to the smell of rotting bodies only to discover the last mango had been eaten! Shitty day right? And just as they're holding on to the last joy in their life, a van comes and eggs them. The person thinks "JUST when I thought things couldn't get any worse..." So they get the gun and BANG. Blood and eggs all ov'da place. And the police would come to investigate and be like... woah, this is intense. Eventually after much research (which I assume would involve calling the house and having no answer from mom, dad or the dog [or the mango?]) the report would read: "Cause of death: Eggs, after a bad day." So in reality, you never know what you're getting in to when you're eggin' someone.

I'm pretty easy going when it comes to people being fucking idiots, and considering I had quite the swell day, the eggs didn't really bother me. My sister's reaction was a little strange: "THAT'S why I always carry a rock with me"... :| Vengeance!!

But to continue with the story... we ended up seeing this helicopter flying around all night, and as we got onto our street, we saw it circulating again, and we thought they are working together! The helicopter scopes out the victims and tells the van the co-ordinates... or, street that they're on... or whatever the fuck those crazy helicopters do, and then the van comes and ovums the shit out of them.

That was a shitty story, and my purse still smells of raw eggs despite being washed (YUM! :/) but on the plus side I returned from Hogwarts today only to find a sweet ass flat screen in my room (not a Bravia as promised but hey I didn't have to pay for it, right? I'm too materialistic).

Maybe some poems tomorrow? Mmmmhmmmmmmmm we'll see how I feel. In the meantime I must go jogging (or as I say, "yogging") because my shorts are starting to not fit and things could get disastrous. I could always do what my sister did and say "nuh thank ya" to the TV and go on a shopping spree... but I have wayyyyy too many clothes to just buy new ones. I'm starting to sound like a princess again (I have got to stop doing that)!

Peace & Sex Pirates,
-Xesetarip


7.06.2010

Stand in line roll call is where the liars died

So I decided to do something different today to spice up the blog...to get away from the boring paragraph after paragraph of usually boring shit that no one really reads anyways...but If you do we have a wonderful Facebook page you can like....*waits for you to go like our page* As you all may know my twin is quite talented at writing and I personally think her poetry is bitchin' and we got to talking and that turned in to me putting up some art I've made and a little bit of lyrics to read while you either enjoy the pictures or have your eyes suffer. So that's all I got for now. I'm trying to get back into this blog writing thing but meh, life's shit and I'm lazy.


Remove sprockets from the machine
Cross wires touch down
Lights out put out the fire
It's right now it's a white sound
It's a transcendental toothache
You'll be feeling for miles
Be just like a battery might try, might lie
While you're breaking the waves
Take a break for a second
Words don't write themselves
~Tidal Waves: Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner
~DGD



And I feel such defeat
Such broken lies in your home
And I feel such pain
From those beautiful brown eyes
And you reach for those words
To wait in line
And I feel such deviance leaving you now
~Tidal Waves: Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner
~DGD


Make you happy at your best
You'd noticed all of this meaningless
I destroy you even through
The only things that i have left for your
Condescending eyes looking at each others
White lies my heart ache is useless
So quickly we will address the shadows running from light
It'll take this breathe denying what is left of us

If you could just wake up tonight
I'd be with you under the sky
With you tonight
~Burning Down the Nicotine Armoire
~DGD


























-Izanrelur

7.05.2010

Monday Poem: Fear

Je suis très heureuse! Pourquoi? Parce que Sean apprend le Français! Nous le parlerons ensemble! (I don't know if that's the correct word...)*Insert humorous French laugh here.*

So today is supposed to be Monday poems, and as much as I don't want to put any effort into conjuring a poem, I do have some inspiration. Or at least an idea in my head. I am going to break from my usual pattern of: 1st poem = rhyming semificion, 2nd = about food, and 3rd = random/serious... just today though. Food is such a key thing to write poems about :)! But yes. Here is today's singular Monday poem (yet again, on Tuesday).


FEAR

An ill-lit path awaits me
Why am I so indifferent?
I feel no inhibitions natural to the human condition.
I am a wanderer.
The passage swallows me whole
And deprives me of my senses.
Where you would turn and run,
I overstay my welcome.
I am elated with the sensation of nothingness.

Why do we wonder what is around every corner?
We obsess over the unknown:
Fear this, fear that.
It's that irrational caution I can not feel.
My mind is clear and my heart beats slow
This alleged menacing ally does nothing to me.
Yet I feel everything.

Internally I am cold.
I don't worry; there's no rationale.
It's like when you're a kid;
Scared to go in the dark basement.
The possibility for a horrific consequence.
It's the nothingness that scares us.
Yet that uncertainty enthralls me.

There is a haunting mystique in the shadows
I am enchanted by the night.
I'll take path of gloom;
Overwhelm my body with deprivation
Of that which keeps us so comforted.
I do not fear.
It could be naïveté.
Or maybe I am just at peace
With the darkness.




-Xesetarip




7.02.2010

My Sheets?! What The Fuck!?



You know you're a nerd when, second to Facebook, you download a Dictionary/Thesaurus application to your phone:

You- I just got this sweet ass phone you can download groovy applications to.
Me- ME TOO
You- Oh yeah? What have you downloaded?
Me- Facebook and a Dictionary/Thesaurus.
You- So, you know you're a nerd then I s'pose.

Hypothetically, that is what would happen if you and I were to discuss it.
~~~

SO, my main story today is the mischievous little mosquitos have found the secret entrance to my room and I have yet to find it. I, the girl who doesn't kill bugs, have killed 2 mosquitos this evening. But I get really nasty scars from bug bites. And I let them have one free bite before I kill them, because they're just trying to survive. Therefore, I have been bitten 4 times since I got home from work.

Also, I need to find this secret entrance to my room. Because maybe it will make it easier for me to steal away in the midst of night.

WAIT WAIT sorry to interrupt but this is important. Listen to this! It's wonderful. Everything about it. I'm grooooovin' to this baby. Anywho...
~~~

Is it super abnormal of me to always have my fitted sheets not-so-fitted in the morning? Like I can tuck them in like crazy but they're always off of the corners of my bed in the morning. Sheets are stupid and this makes my life very difficult. Like right now, I'm just staring at my untucked sheets knowing I'm going to tuck them in and then have them untucked in the morning. I don't think I squirm that much? Do I?............................................................................................................................................................ There. I paused and tucked my sheets in. This better be worth it...
~~~

It takes two to tango, but only one to play the maracas!
~~~

I can't write any more because I'm too tired! 4:19am. I will commence tomorrow with a sober mind and a few ZZZs (and those are pronounced "zeds" not "zees").

For now,
Xesetarip


G'DAY! IT 2 DAYS LATER --AND IT APPEARS I HAVE CLICKED "CAPS LOCK" eh hem. The reason why I didn't write yesterday was because I was too busy buying the most fabulous shoes in the world!
Okay I understand why folks could potentially think they're awful/hooker shoes but I've been in love with them for years and I can't believe I fucking own them! They used to have them in a different colour and I wanted them soooo bad but they were too expensive. And one day I was like "meh maybe I should just get them" and then they were GONE. I checked the site and they stopped selling them. Then a couple months later I check online and I see these limited edition beauts. So I was going to order them because I went a little crazy... and then I went into D-Tox and saw them and freaked out like a little girl and bought them immediately. It was pretty much the happiest day of my life. Okay not really but I was super happy. $76 well spent.
AND NOW I HAVE TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING ELSE...

Just take a look at this:


















SEE THAT SHIT! My sheets are pulled off again!? Seriously what the fuck am I doing in my sleep to make this happen!? I need some kind of tranquillizer or something so I stop squirming. And some nights it's worse than that too! Like its off at the top and bottom! This is just bewildering to me. No matter how much I tuck the little bastard in, it still comes out. Anyone have a staple gun? I'ma fix this shit for good I tell ya. Though if I stapled it, it would become very difficult to wash. WHY must I be in this situation!?


~~~

I have also discovered that, in general rootbeer-liking people dislike iced tea, and visa versa. I am on the rootbeer end.

Okay, I have to finish putting my clothes away in my new old dresser! And I have a lot of clothes. Like fuck. I am way too materialistic. But not in a princess way. Well kinda since I was like "omg shoooeeeessss" but they're zombie shoes. I have too many thoughts.

BUH BYE
-Xesetarip


7.01.2010

Good Font and Dance Party

I am drunk. Because. I went to Sean's Canada Day shindig and drank an abundance of tequila and PBR. I type well. Be astonished. It's the content that will be peculiar. Here are some random (and all too honest) thoughts:

-See this Courier font? It's my favourite in the world and I'm getting my next tattoo written in this font. But maybe bolder.
-I eat spinach
every day
-Guys who are academically smarter than me are hot. As long as they're not cocky about it.
-Why can't people drive? Like, really. Speed limit. If anything, exceed it, don't go below. Fucker.
-The concept of "getting butterflies" is weird. I'm too badass for that shit. Right...? :( Sorry, sentimental music is playing.
-I like to have dance parties. Well, I like to dance. And whether I'm alone or with people... when yer dancin' it's a party. So please, play some music and LET'S FUCKIN' DANCE!
-Did you know the Queen was in Etobicoke? Weird eh? She was probably originally going to Toronto but got scared because of the riots... heh heh.
-Okay... cake. Let's have some.
-Please please talk to me about music. Just do it. I love music. New music I don't know but maybe should know? Please. And then we can have a dance party together!
-What does Obama do every day? Like, what kind of alarm clock does he have and what time does he wake up and what in the fuck does that man eat for breakfast? Hopefully eggs. He seems like an egg guy.
-My boyfrans, dey be doctors:
-Bret and Jemaine are haut.
-They only charge 5c what a bargain!
-I'm sure they know what they're talking about. If not, their accents will entertain you until you cheer the fuck up.
-Buy me Bret's hat for Christmas
-And Jemaine's scarf
-How convenient is it that no cars have run them over yet?
-I'm tired.
-Jemaine looks better with a beard than without
-I like Jemaine better
-Bret is a hobbit anyway
-I want to learn to play "Robots" on the spoons
-That made no sense. I meant washboard.
-Or guitar. Or ukulele for added pizzaz.
-I spelled "ukulele" and "pizzaz" wrong.
-I MISS DRUMS! :(
-The cool thing about having contacts is that you can buy all the sunglasses you want and STILL be able to see.
-The cool thing about having a lot of shoes is that you have a lot of shoes.
-I'm way too fucking tired for this and this is awful.

G'night at 3:17am,
Xesetarip